One of the many lessons from my mom
My Desire through this blog is to bring in the perspective of women who have raised their children and the treasures that they have been given through the years of struggles and triumphs. I have been given the desire to interview women from diverse cultures, backgrounds, and stages in life as mothers to give us all insight and lessons from which we can all grow.
Being that this will be my first blog post, I would like to begin with the woman who raised me and has taught me many lessons in my 40 years of life and helped me along in my 20 years of being a mother.
As I think of who my mom is I can say this “She is worth far more than rubies” Proverbs 31:10. She has worked tirelessly and continues to do so to ensure her family is well taken care of.
While talking to my mom about the valuable lessons she has learned as a mother, I requested her to share about her top 3 things she would like for the new generation of moms to know:
1. Every one of our children have different characters and we needed to mold along with them.
2. Try to be flexible with your food choices to give your family what they like and are nutritious.
3. Learn to stay quiet when you know your children are having some difficulties as adults to not add more problems to them.
As our conversation went on, I asked her about her greatest accomplishment as a mother:
Vicky: I can see my children are in a quite different place than some who may be lost and don’t know anything about the Lord.
Ana: So, your greatest accomplishment was teaching them about the Lord?
V: Yes, I believe so.
A: What difficulties have you experienced and overcome:
V: In-laws were a difficulty and I have been learning that you need to stay quiet, because like they say “calladita te vez mas bonita” translation “you look prettier when you are quiet.”
A: What about the best advice you could give your 21-year-old self if you could
V: I may have said to wait to get married. I may have waited to be older. At 21 years old I didn’t know how to treat a baby, how to care for him. I would have waited and enjoy my youth. I worked away from home when I was just a little girl. I was never really taught all the things you need to know when you get married.
How I’ve processed what my mom has taught me
As I process my mom’s answers, I too can reflect on the last 20 years of being a mom. I can certainly agree with many of the things which she once shared with me as I was growing up. Honestly speaking at the time, I did not understand her point of view, nor did I want to attempt to understand (because of my lack of maturity – you know what it’s like being young and thinking you have it all figured out). Life has a way of showing you how much you still need to learn and mature. Humility has been one of the lessons life has taught me through my mom. Because my mom didn’t work outside of the home once married, and my parents are extremely traditional. The finances were always to ensure that the family was maintained and steady. My parents didn’t have luxury in their home, but I would say that anyone who would walk through their doors would know that they lived a life that sustained a family with what was important: the love and nurturing of parents who care about their children. Now don’t think my parents were perfect because they will probably be the first to state that they weren’t. But the lessons that they taught our family were worth more than what money can buy. The focus again was to ensure that we all had the opportunity to reach our potential.
My parents have endured many hardships with each of their children, myself included. My mom would probably say she has learned to keep going and remain close to God. At her young age of 75, she would also say that although her life has not been easy, it has been worth it. I know that my grandmother’s words were of high importance to my mom, and she values the teachings she received from them. this is why my mom many times will quote my grandmother (her mom). Which leads me back to how she learned what humility looked like. One of the things my mom has shared with me is to be content with what my husband can provide. She has said “no obligues que tu marido llege a robar,” translation: “don’t force your husband to decide he needs to steal”. What my grandmother taught my mom and what they have shown me and taught me was that sometimes we may not have the extra money for things we’d like or things we desire, but we do have enough to be content and keep our family flourishing. Humility is not something you wear or something you flaunt but rather a condition of the heart. Humility is an expression of satisfaction; no matter how wealthy or poor you are. Yes, humility is to be seen by how you respond to your personal circumstances. As of recent I have been getting a lesson in humility.
I have recently been out of a 9 to 5 type of job and doors have remained closed in the area where I am used to working. Although our home continues to be sustained by the grace of God, there has been a part of me that just doesn’t want to let go of the idea that I may never work in the clinical setting again. I have sat with the Lord on many occasions asking Him why? And to please help me understand, but His ways are not our ways. Although I know this to be truth, I can say that to let go has been hard and I think that part of being human and going through tough moments in life, gives us the opportunity to grow, to mature, to learn, and to seek. So here I am trying to learn something new, I’m trying to take this challenge and keep going just as my mom has taught me. The values and the words she has instilled in me have been a motivation to me and with all humility I will say that in this season of my life I want to make my time count for something. I don’t want to sit around and waste this precious time moping or feeling sorry for myself. I want to be more than a conquer no matter what I may need to endure in life.
Likewise you younger people, submit yourselves to your elders. Yes, all of you be submissive to one another, and be clothed with humility, for “God resists the proud, But gives grace to the humble.” 1 Peter 5:5
For thus says the High and Lofty One
Who inhabits eternity, whose name is Holy:
“I dwell in the high and holy place,
With him who has a contrite and humble spirit,
To revive the spirit of the humble,
And to revive the heart of the contrite ones.
With this shared, I would like to invite you to sign up for my future blogs as I continue to venture into more opportunities to share the lives of mothers. My hope and prayer is to inspire you to keep running your race. To keep teaching your children the values that will bring our world the hope we all need. We mothers possess the opportunity to change the future of our communities, our cities, our country, but most importantly the future of our own families. I thank you for taking the time to read this post and please send me a comment on your thoughts and/or words of encouragement.